We are 4 girls, living the life! A Life full of Passion, Love, Joy, Goodness and Purity! We haven't arrived at this place in our lives without our share of tears and laughter, so we want to tell you about it! Our lives are stories of Redemption and Goodness. Enjoy being brought into our lives by listening to us share our hearts!
- Amy, Lisa, Tamara, & Danielle
Hey, my name is Amy and yes, I am a 30 year-old virgin. "How did you do that?" you may ask. "And for goodness' sake's why?" others may question. Well, those are some questions that I do hope to address through this blog. I was born and raised in the Bible belt of BC, to very loving parents, who happened to be none other than pastors. Yup, I'm a pastor's kid, and I could tell you many stories about church life- the good, the bad, and the ugly.
Honestly, I think the church has been far too quiet about this issue, and I guess that inspires me to speak my mind on the beautiful and powerful gift we call "sex." After all, I believe sexuality was God's idea, designed and created by Him with passion. I am also a "sub"- a substitute teacher for middle and elementary schools, and I know my students are forced to make life-altering decisions about "sex" at a younger and younger age.
I'm simply one of those dreamers who dreams of making a difference in the world by showing Love to people- whether it's in my nation of Canada, faraway in parts of Africa, or absolutely anywhere. I'm actually leaving in less than one week for a four month adventure in Kampala, Uganda. I will be mentoring young girls who had been used as child soldiers and sex slaves by the Lord's Resistance Army in Northern Uganda. I wonder if they may have some very different ideas about sex than we do in North America. But mostly I am just a young woman on a quest to find what true Love, true beauty, and true intimacy really are.
Hi, I'm Lisa. No, I am not an alcoholic. I'm not a drug addict. I'm 29 years old and single. Yes, sometimes it feels like they all fall into the same category, and sometimes it feels as though being addicted to something is far more common than being a single woman in today’s world. For those that don't know, singleness is not an incurable illness, and it's not a disease to be caught. It's just being single. Some may ask, “Well, how long have you been single for?” 29 years to be exact! (pause for shock and awe). Some of you may be reading this saying "Yes, someone I can relate too, someone who knows what I've been going through" and some maybe wondering what the heck is wrong with me (don't worry, I've asked myself the same thing once or twice).
Let’s start at the beginning. I come from a family of 4 kids, and I'm the oldest. I am not biased, ok maybe a little, but we are 4 great looking people, each with very different stories. My mom is my Hero. She was born and raised in Canada, and my Dad was born and raised in Argentina. I come from a multi-cultural family, and I love that. I have always been aware of culture and the large world we are a part of. Sometimes living with someone that has English as a second language can be interesting to say the least. We had to do lots of translating and deciphering. I grew up with an aunt that spoke to us in English, Spanish and Italian in one sentence, so deciphering is my specialty.
So you see I was "normal" and part of a "normal" family, with a semi-normal upbringing, and then I find myself in a "not so normal" part of my life. Some people might even assume I am a misfit or socially inept. Nope, none of the above is true. I can't explain why I find myself here, but I do know that I have quite a few people around me that have at one time or another found themselves here as well. I have a few role models, people I can look at and say, “this wait, this dream of being married and having a family and NOT being single anymore will happen and I will find a great guy, it happened for them.”
So there you have it. I'm living me, I am 29, I have never had a boyfriend. I have shared one kiss in 29 years (stay tuned for that story). Yes, I'm a virgin and No, I don't plan on being the old, grumpy, crazy spinster that never ends up married. I plan on allowing this time in my life to be my story. I want to share what I've gone through and what I am feeling, my highest highs and my lowest lows. I want this to encourage and help anyone, even if it's one person going through a "single time" in their life. You can do it, it's possible, because I'm doing it, and I'm still alive. I know, hard to believe.
My name is Tamara. I am 29 years old and currently living in beautiful British Columbia. I grew up in a small town in southern Ontario, and as the saying goes “you can take the girl out of the country, but you can never take the country out of the girl.” That stands true to this day.
I grew up running through fields and catching toads, but my first love was the game of basketball. I was always playing: early mornings in the high school gym, scrimmaging with the guys at recess, practicing after school, playing in the driveway at night til it was too dark to see the rim. Back in grade 5, I set the goal for myself that I wanted to receive a full-ride scholarship to play basketball at a D-1 University in the States. Fast-forward about 7 years later (and a lot of hard work), and my biggest dream of playing D-1 came true. Enter Indiana State University. The road was paved. I felt like I was living some sort of fairytale (at least through my eyes): “The small town Canadian girl to make it big.” Well, unfortunately, and as we all know, not all fairy tales have happy endings. There came an unexpected turn of events, suddenly the paved road started to crumble beneath me; pain crept in and it suddenly dawned on me after more than 7 years of putting my entire heart and soul in to a game, there was more to my life after all. I was not just a basketball player, my identity encompassed much more.
I turned down my scholarship after one year of playing at Indiana State and transferred to the University of Windsor. The remaining years of my undergraduate degree consisted of a desperate search to discover who exactly I was and the road to get there wasn’t pretty. It meant looking in and facing the pain; years worth of self hatred, striving excessively, cutting, bulimia, and unhealthy relationships.
In terms of being a “29 year old virgin,” well, it is true, I am 29; through the eyes of the world and what any old dictionary defines as “virgin,” I guess I fall short. That being said, I do not fall short of God’s definition of “virgin,” and this my friends, is not a story of what was, but of what has become. This story, my story, is a story of redemption.
And so, I am a 29 year old woman who is choosing to reclaim her virtue. I have reached a place in my life where I believe sex is worth waiting for. I believe sex really is meant to be pure, holy and good, it really is meant to be shared with someone who loves and cherishes you completely and unconditionally.
As I wait, I follow the call God has placed on my life; simply to encourage, inspire and love the people around me. I am currently an Outreach Worker, working with the street-entrenched homeless population, and have just begun my Masters in Leadership. I love soaking in the beauty around me; people most of all, and children. I love orphans, and widows, and the elderly. I love silence and stillness, sunrises and sunsets, a blanket of stars in the night sky, mountains, fields of wildflowers, forests, lakes and the ocean. I love radiant colors and cultures. I love hiking, running, cycling, dancing, laughing, creating and being wild, fun and free! I love cruising passenger side, with the windows down, wind in my hair, radio up and bare feet up on the dashboard. I love writing love letters (to everyone/anyone!) and I love “practicing random acts of kindness and senseless acts of beauty” (Anne Herbert). I love resting in God’s peace, grace, and love. I love moments of prayer where it feels like heaven has been brought to earth. I love the beauty and mystery of this gift of life.
I look forward to sharing from my heart in this blog with three of my most dear friends…
Let me tell you a little bit about me....
I come from a mixed up family (don’t we all at some level!?). Mine is a tale of copious moves, parental separation, foster homes, a safe house, shadows of sexual abuse and misuse, and eventually the glorious firm foundation of Christ discovered amidst a ‘hand-picked’ family. Oh, how He loves us! Oh, how I love Him! I have called my “Aunt and Uncle” home since I was 14 years old. Sadly the rest of my siblings have scattered far, with loosely bound strings reminding us that we once belonged together. Isn’t it incredible how God takes His newly made cords and weaves us into a ‘present family’? So often, when the lie emerges that I am alone and without anchor, I am reminded of how He has woven me into an actual ‘tapestry’ where I can fit just right. He knows just what we need!
My passions are open. I love art- all things about art- painting, drawing, looking at art, looking at the world like it is art, talking about art, displaying art!
I love my job! I am a registered nurse and feel I am built to nurture, know, comfort and encourage. I love being able to hold steady the waves of crisis when disease, trauma or hardship falls. I revel in the joy that bubbles up when I teach someone about their health, knowing such education will last longer than any prescription. I graduated from university and worked for four years in a rural, northern BC hospital focusing my energies mainly on maternal/child care. Then God sent me overseas to do primary health care clinics for two weeks. There I was ‘baptised’ into the truth of praying for healing and seeing miraculous outcomes! What a transformation! I soon realized that I needed to learn more about pediatrics, so I moved to the ‘big city’ to start a job at BC Children’s. I stayed there for two years and now have begun a new journey to a job in the emerg- a place I would have never expected to be. Ironically, I always said I would be working with kids (I can hardly remember a time when I didn’t want to be a pediatrician), but anyone who knows me will testify to the fact I am NOT naturally suited to this ER position. I am not fast. I am not Julianna Margalise. But I keep reminding myself that God promises to fill in every gap we have for the things He is calling us to.
So there we go… God fills every gap. I’ve seen it- in my past, in my travels, in the missions I have been on, in my everyday work life. Still, it takes raw courage to believe He will fill the gap in my heart. I’ve been in one serious relationship which taught me a LOT- let’s just call that lesson “The Humbling Power of Chemistry”- stay tuned for more on that! For me, this blog is about sharing a walk of strength, adventure, knowledge and faith through a season of singleness. This has been my greatest ‘“suffering producing...hope” (Romans 5:6- yup, read it!). When I learn about the glory of a baby growing, when I see the beautiful collaboration parents make to keep their kids healthy, when I feel my heart leap at the sight of distant lands and look for eyes to share it with... it all makes me realize trusting the One who fills every gap is tough- tougher than I thought it would be. But when I look and see His face gazing back at me, I know that it’s His hands that created that baby; when I see His power bonding families together, I think… oh how lovely He is!