A Love that Ruins You

A jealous and loving God is calling out, He’s calling you to go higher, deeper, farther with Him. He’s calling your name. His love is an endless depth of greatness. If this isn’t truth to you, if you don’t see God that way, no worries, I’ll introduce ya to that God. He’s here, available, seeking and loving you.

I believe in a God that created all the beauty of this world and yet is more satisfied in watching your beauty. He created you, to love you. He formed and fashioned you, to LOVE YOU. If you never said a kind word to Him or about Him, if you denied Him all the days of your life that would NEVER change the great depth and power of His love for you.

GOD LOVES YOU!

I know this might seem obvious to some, but this truth is SINKING in more and more. The more I believe the truth of His unrelenting love, making it my very core and life mandate, the more prepared I will be to love and honour my husband when the time is here. It will come from a healthy place of such depth and prayerfully mirroring that of my God, my Beloved, Jesus.

I am having a constant revelation of His love for me this week. I am listening to Mike Bickel’s teaching on Song of Solomon. Some of you just rolled your eyes and are now tuning out. Hahaha… this was a book that always intrigued me, I knew there were more to the words than what I understood. There is mention of spices, scents, flowers and singsong words that didn’t make sense, until now! (Well it’s starting to)

I started taking the words in this song and believing them, reading them with different eyes. Giving thanks for them, and praying them. I’ll explain what I mean. 

 Song of Solomon 1:2 & 4:9

1:2a- “May He (Jesus) kiss me with the kisses of his mouth (word, is what mouth is translated to in this verse). The “Bride” is speaking to her heavenly Father, about her Jesus.

During the day I have been speaking them out, like this.

“Jesus may you kiss me with the kisses of your word. May your word, your truth reach deep into my heart, expanding my understanding, my capacity, my grid for your love for me. Your word, your truth speaks of a great love, let the greatness, the mind blowing greatness overtake my life, my heart, my relationships (present and future). Ruin me with a love I have yet to encounter. THANK YOU for paving the way so I have the ability to taste a love from a God that created the wonder and beauty in all I see. Wow, I am in awe, I am just a broken person that you have deemed worthy of your love, and you lavish it upon me, and when you look at me, you see me as whole.”

 1:2b- “for YOUR (Heavenly Father’s) love is better than wine (the glory and pleasure). She speaks to her heavenly father.

“Thank you Papa that your love is better than wine, than all the earthly pleasures. May I feel the intoxication of your love; I want to be overtaken by the ecstasy of your love. This love is what I crave, yearn for, long for and need in my life. Teach me how to understand it with my human mind, and into the depths of my spirit. May your love be the mirror image of the love I exude in my life. May my husband and I learn to love from your great example.“

4:9- “You have made My (Jesus’) heart beat faster” Jesus is speaking to His Bride, to you and I.

 “Jesus, my beloved. Thank you that I make your heart beat faster. Thank you, wow, I make your heart beat faster. Let that truth over take my heart and mind, allow that truth to expand and grow more and more every day. I want to be changed by that truth, WRECK ME with that revelation. Help me not to ever take that for granted, I must live my life differently…I, Lisa (insert your name) make your heart beat faster! This has been the cry of my heart to be seen as lovely, so lovely that with one glance of my eye I can cause a quickening of love in ones heart, and here you are, the Saviour of the world, your heart beats faster when you think of me, when I glance at you. I AM IN LOVE WITH YOU!” 

Wow…Wow… how can you not be changed by those thoughts, by those words, by HIS ACTIONS! He is a God worth serving, worth living a life of purity in every area. I want to love Him as well as He loves me. I want my life to be poured out before him as an offering, a sweet fragrance of love. My heart is forever changed, and I pray that you will also allow this revelation grow and deepen. That you would be rocked by a God that created you so He can love you. Died so He can love you then rose again and saved you so that He can love you forEVER. Yet, even if you never glanced His way, HE STILL LOVES YOU AND ALWAYS WILL.

Introduction made, and this is just a drop in the bucket, just a small glimpse of His VAST and GREAT LOVE.

This Song Is on Repeat for me... it's good!

The Final Push to the Finish Line!

You’re coming around the final bend, you can see the finish line in the distance, at least you are hoping it’s not just a mirage but the actual finish line. Weariness is washing over you tired body, mind, emotions and even you will. You think to your self, I don’t think I can make it; can I take another step? Can I finish? Am I going to make it? Maybe I’ll stop right here, just be done. Then it happens.

Can you hear them? The rush of their voices snap you back to life, the roaring sound shoots another round of adrenaline coursing though your body. You forget the temporary pain; the frustrating thoughts of not making it further and you lift your head up and press on. You know that you have to finish, and not just finish, but do it well.

In the last 2 weeks, I have had this deep impression that the finish line is near, it’s not just a mere idea anymore. I am rounding that last bend in the road and I can taste the victory of the finish line. Now again, this is just a deep impression, I have no man in my life currently that is pursuing me, but I can feel the end drawing near, that is about to change.

I have had a lot of “please God let it be soon” moments but nothing like this, nothing where I feel like at any moment my life is going to change in a way I have been only able to dream about and feel as though it may never happen. The end of the race is near, I am tired; my mind, will and emotions are tired. In Matthew and then In Luke, Jesus had angels come and minister strength to Him when He was almost at the finish line, in the desert of temptation and in the garden of Gethsemane. 2 weeks ago I had that spoken over me that angels were being sent to strengthen me in my tired and weary state of holding onto hope; hope for a future husband and family that my heart aches for.  Yet I know He has sent angels to minister strength to me.

In this last week, I have had more prophetic words and prayer come my way than any time in my life. It’s a buzz in the air; I’m on the last stretch of this race and all my friends and family are lining the track and their cheers and cries and prayers are so loud, the very foundations of time are being awakened. Heaven is invading earth in my life and my greatest and loudest cheerleader, my Beloved Jesus is running beside me. He is whispering truth and life and love and light into the deepest parts of me. There is no crevice of my life that hasn’t been touched by Jesus’ kindness, grace, mercy, love and passion. All of heaven is pressing into this last leg of my race, I feel this crescendo of excitement becoming louder, resonating through me. He’s coming.

This is the picture I have of this moment in my life. (Paraphrased from memory the Divine Romance by Gene Edwards) God created Eve and brought her away before Adam awoke. When Adam awoke God and him roamed the earth naming all the animals upon the earth (ps. that’s a lot of animals, must have taken him awhile). When Adam was finished, Eve heard the deep calling of her beloved; He responded and came running. They bounded towards each other from across the earth responding to heavens call for a union to occur. I am feeling as though in my daily steps through life, I am bounding towards what heaven is cheering for, my beloved.

How blessed I am to have those around me, lifting me up to my Papa and praying, crying out and rejoicing in what His plans are. I am finishing this race well, not quitting, or giving up or letting it “die”; I am fighting for the last few miles and going to finish them strong with my beloved running along side to the place where I will meet my earthly love. I am coming by love, here I am; I will know you when I see you and you will know me when we meet. 

Let's Just be Friends Line.

The Friend Zone...

*This is my personal opinion and should be viewed as such, if you agree- High Fives, if you Disagree- High Fives. This video was done from a place of love and honour not to dishonour anyone!

The Wrestle…

Over the last few weeks, I have been in a bit of a wrestle with God. I feel like I’m living out a modern day story of Jacob from the bible, where He wrestled with God and wouldn’t let go until God blessed him… in the end Jacob forever had a limp but was blessed by God.
I feel like the amount of faith, trust and wrestling that has happened over the past few weeks will forever leave me with a limp, not in a bad way but a good way. It’s created in me an inner strength that will forever leave me changed and strong and sturdy. Gosh, it’s been hard.
Instead of beating my body into submission, I am speaking truth to my heart and life over my mind to grasp the fact that God is bigger than my little problems and that He has a much greater plan than I do, even when I can’t see it.
I sometimes have a hard time when I see others receive what I’ve been crying out for, and really, what human being doesn’t have a hard time with that. I sometimes feel twinges of jealousy, but mostly a longing that runs deep; but I am sick of living in my lack, and seeing my lack and not keeping my eyes focused on what I do have and this AMAZING life I am living.
In the last few weeks I have spent many nights in my car, speaking out loud over myself. I speak out that my heart will not just get the fact that God is good but will have a deep knowing that God is good. I am calling my emotions into check and not basing my life off my emotions or circumstances or lack, but seeing the centre of my life, Jesus as the solid rock He is, the one who takes care of me, the one who shows me how much my Heavenly Father loves me.
I am sick of living in want. I am sick of those jealousy twinges and I am calling out peace in the midst of turmoil. I am calling out trust in the midst of needing. I am calling out Love in the midst of longing. I am calling out joy in the midst of worry, and I am calling out patience in the midst of angst. My heart will get this, I will not just know these things in my head, but my heart will come under the knowing that I am loved, I am going to have the things God’s promised, He is good!
So to help my heart in getting all this, I have decided to start a routine. I wake up to a great spoken word in the morning, to remind me that my Heavenly Father has GOOD PLANS for my life and to remind my heart that I am secure in His love and wrapped up in His embrace. It’s called the Father’s Love Letter. (see attached video link below)

www.fathersloveletter.com/video.html

I still have many moments in the day where worry over finances seem to overtake me and when I feel like I might be 75 before I meet the man I am going to marry. I wonder will I ever own a house of my own? Will I ever have a nice car in the driveway with my name on it? Will I ever not live pay cheque to pay cheque? That’s when I remind my heart that God knows the plans He has for me, and they are to prosper me and to give me a hope and a future, so therefore it doesn’t matter what happens because I can trust that He has more things planned than I could ever imagine and He is a good Father, one that comes through with this promises and provides abundantly for His kids, for me.
I may, in the end, be forever changed and have the markings of someone that has persevered and pushed through the emotions and changed the wrong thinking and embraced the truth, trusting that His plans are greater than mine, even when I can’t see it and my heart is arguing against it. I will not stop wrestling, I will be blessed.

Single... No, not me!!

I am Single… Hmmm… I’ve been thinking about this phrase lately!

I have also been pondering the idea that our words can create or shape our view of life, self and the future. Our words are powerful!

When we wake up in the morning and the first words out of our mouth are “I’m tired” and you keep saying it all day long, you are going to have a very tired day. But what if instead of saying I’m tired, we said I’m awake and alive and maybe I need to go to bed earlier so I’m not fatigued.

If we told a little girl from the time she was young that she was ugly, she would never think otherwise, she would believe she was ugly, or the reverse, a little girl was told everyday she was beautiful she would KNOW she was beautiful.

So, back to “I am Single”. What does that mean? According to the English Dictionary a few definitions are:

single |ˈsi ng gəl|
1 only one; • not accompanied or supported by others; alone.

I don’t know about you, but I am not “only one” or “alone” or “not supported by others”. I have a great community of friends and family that support, encourage and love me. I have a God that has plans, a purpose and a destiny that is not full of being alone.

I personally don’t want to keep proclaiming over myself that I am single. To be honest sometimes my emotions have me feeling alone or not supported, but what a lie that is. My unwed relational status doesn’t mean I’m alone, it means I’m in a season of waiting for the one God has!

So my word to replace “Single” is “Spoken For”. God has spoken for me to marry someday, I have a husband, I just don’t know his name yet. God has spoken for me, He is my beloved first and foremost, He is the one speaking out my future and destiny, especially in this season of waiting.

I had a 2% day on Saturday and a bit of a melt down, I’ve been feeling a little left out of the whole relationship area and I was kind of mad at God. I had a moment of screaming in a small car, in a quiet parking lot; what I drove away feeling (besides a headache) was that I am not alone, God was right beside me, allowing me to cry and scream and freak out, the whole time whispering, “I created Him Lisa, He exists, He is praying for you, He is Loving you and He is Longing for you too.” The peace that surpasses all understanding met me in that moment, in that small car and quiet parking lot. I am NOT alone, God is ever present. I am NOT unsupported; my friends so readily prayed for me with arms stretched out.

I AM NOT SINGLE, I AM SPOKEN FOR. (by a MIGHTY God and a Searching Husband)